Attached

I remember this time last summer I thought I was in love with someone. Maybe it’s that I love Grease and have always wanted a summer love, but lately I’ve been spending my days letting guys down easily. I’ve had four guy friends tell me they want to be more than friends since I’ve come home from college. I was honestly shocked by each confession, and I let each guy know that I’m not looking for anything right now, especially because I’m going to work at a summer camp. However, one boy is starting to get under my skin.

I have been hopelessly crushing on a boy I met online for years. We would play online games for hours and hours together, and we’d flirt and laugh, and talk, and just be there for one another. Unfortunately I think he’s grown bored of me. I don’t think he’d wait for me to finish college to be together, and I don’t even think he thinks of me the same way I think of him. I wish he did, but to him I was just someone to pass the time. At the end of the day he’s far away from me, and it was just a crush. I only have memories now.

Nevertheless, my pathetic self is getting attached to a new online boy. It’s nothing romantic right now, but I just find myself wanting to talk to him all day long and getting disappointed when he is busy or doesn’t hold the conversation. I fear that I’m trying to make him into the online guy I was crushing on for so long, but he’s his own person. I have been trying to distance myself, but every night I message him and ask if he wants to play League of Legends or some other game. It’s sad, but I am like this. I get attached to people way too fast, and they get bored of me even faster.

Luckily I am leaving for camp soon, so I plan to annoy the crap outta him every day until I leave. Once I’m gone, I predict he’ll forget all about me honestly. Then I will be going back to college and won’t be so lonely because I’ll be back with my friends. So I’m going to let myself be as annoying and attached as I want to be until I leave for camp, and then it’s quitting cold turkey. I think it’ll all be okay, I shouldn’t be worried about this, I should be focusing on camp. Oh well.

Speaking of camp, let’s talk about that. It’s been awhile since I told you all my plan to write everything about camp, that plan is still in effect. Well I think that’s all for today.

-AcuteAnimosity

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